BY MELISSA PYLE
Special to the Telegraph
Pretina Hutchinson says her life began with deep struggles, ones she thought she had overcome, but as each year unfolded, she felt like something was holding her down, blocking her destiny. Hutchinson began to realize that the “something” was unprocessed trauma, hanging around her soul like a weight around her neck, dragging her away from her full potential. The unprocessed pain was becoming a stumbling block in her life, a burden she would eventually call a “Destiny Blocker”.
This is what inspired the title of her new book. A story born out of her own healing process and now her life’s mission. A mission to see others experience the same physical, emotional and spiritual deliverance so they too can truly succeed in life.
Hutchinson, now a pastor and licensed mental health counselor, said that despite her outward appearance of success, she recognized patterns of poor relationship choices, fear and pleasing people that continued to repeat themselves. She said “the devil uses people, strategies, family, friends, lovers, even spiritual leaders to create confusion, delay, deception and soul ties to bind us.” She says these things can cause people to feel trapped in negative patterns.
Hutchinson said as she began confronting her pain, she had to face the trauma that began in her childhood. She described her childhood as nonexistent, because as the oldest of five children, her mother needed her to help in caring for her younger siblings. She was like an extra mother, a “little adult.” She said she later realized this was a family cycle and at the time she’d assumed that was how all families functioned. She remembers cooking her first meal at just nine years old. She said in her world, if she could provide help by working, she received validation and love, but if she performed poorly, punishment. She says she did what many children do in these circumstances, they don’t live life, they survive. She attributes this early trauma to her later struggle with people pleasing at all costs, a trait that would eventually land her in toxic relationships. She said she has learned that “broken people attract broken people.”
Eventually, her mother left the home, leaving Hutchinson feeling abandoned and burdened by the task of helping her father raise her 5-year-old twin brothers. Despite all the difficulties she was determined to graduate from Bradford High School, which she did. She said all the stress at home caused her to struggle to keep her grades up, but God gave her a drive to graduate.
Hutchinson also shared the painful reality that throughout her childhood she was subjected to other abuses at the hands of people she should have been able to trust. These abusers caused her to feel shamed and worthless. She said through all these struggles, her one saving grace was her father and his mother, each encouraged her to forgive others, even the abandonment she’d experienced. She said her grandmother taught her that unforgiveness is like cancer and will destroy a person from the inside out. She recalls that stories from the Bible, like that of Joseph in Genesis, encouraged her faith and reminded her that “What the devil meant for evil, God will use for good.”
As Hutchinson grew to adulthood, she experienced failed relationships, she attributes those failures to her own brokenness that needed healing. That healing would only come through recognizing the root of her problem: learned behaviors and misguided love. Hutchinson said, “We see with our heart, it shows our mind what to see.” So, if a person is operating from a damaged heart, they don’t see clearly. She referred to Proverbs 4:23, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; For out of it are the issues of life.”
Hutchinson said to begin healing, a person needs to confront their pain by asking themselves why. Why do I follow these patterns? As she recognized her own “why” and began to work toward a new life, one with a better understanding of how her painful past had shaped her insecurities and incessant people pleasing. She was able to finally walk towards true healing, and as Jeremiah 29:11 says. “to give you a future and a hope.”
This renewed hope was reignited when Hutchinson turned 50 last year and says it has been her new beginning. She wants to turn her pain into purpose by following what she feels is her mission, offering faith based mental health to the community. She wants people to know they can experience “deliverance” no matter what they may have experienced, but first, they need to get to the root of the problem. She said many people need help discovering the “why” at the root of their depression or other mental health crisis. She says if they begin to understand the causes, they can begin to accept God’s unconditional love and healing.
This concept is also part of her mission at Jesus Christ Deliverance Ministries and the purpose behind her new book, “Destiny Blockers,” in which she gives her real, raw, story, along with practical steps for the reader to begin processing their own trauma. Hutchinson says the book is short and powerful, and it’s a piece of her soul She says writing the book was part of her own restorative journey and prays it can help many people who have struggled.
Hutchinson’s book, “Destiny Blockers,” can be purchased at Barnes and Noble and on Amazon.
